2003 in retrospect... and my hopes for 2004

As we bid 2003 goodbye, we bid farewell to a very tumultous year that all of us has gone through. If you ever ask me what I want for 2004, it's one word --- PEACE.

On the world front, we've gone through the SARS outbreak, the flu bug, and the Iraq War. These events, as well as the sustained terrorist attacks in the Middle East will have made us feel rather distraught as we spent the times in April and May walking and working in fear of the coronavirus. We saw Saddam's statue topple and 7 months later, captured. We watched the anti-war protests. In this year of the Goat, why do we see so many bad things happening? Is it the accumulation of everyone's bad karma? Should we reflect on our own deeds to stop such tragedies from happening? 2003 has too many tragedies and notable deaths. 2004 to me is a symbol of reflection over what bad things has occured in the past. I don't want any dramatic epidemics or earthquakes to plague 2004.

In addition, we got to see how George W Bush handle the campaign next year. Personally, I didn' t really support his actions of sidelining the US economy, the recontruction of Afghanistan all because of Iraq. (I was a bit pissed about our govt's support for the war. too bad, thanks to the FTA) I'd love to see him replaced next year, in my own personal opinion. 2004's worth an interesting look in US politics. Remember the number '589'? If not, find out yourself.

And as usual, Ah Bian's playing with fire. So what? A referendum is symbolic. It's a waste of paper and ink and time. How can you hold a referendum over a foreign country's aggression? China won't lift a finger no matter what happens. I'd love to see how Lien Chan and James Soong fight their way to topple Ah Bian without having any internal disagreements. Taiwanese politics is the most entertaining, dirty, scandalous, slanderous..... you can make a reality show out of it! It'll be hotter than Survivor All-Stars and Amazing Race combined!

On the home front, I have one word --- DEBATE. We come back to the long standing problem..... is the economy on its track towards recovery? Can we be tenacious? Can credibility of all be sustained? As we look back at Mindef's unlucky encounters this year over RSS Courageous and training-related deaths, for someone who'll be going to NS in 2005 will seem abit shaky, especially when the tiger babies recorded one of the lowest birth rates. In addition, we've Shankar Aiyar's guilty judgement as well as Steve Chia's nude scandal. In short, we've seen credibilities of various personalities destroyed. The thing is, can the credibility, which was destroyed in 2003, be recovered in 2004? Will political awareness rise thanks to the recent Steve Chia scandal? Presidential elections due in 2005, parliamentary elections in 2007.

On the TJC front, I have one word --- REFORM. Especially with the recent annoucement that our college is joining the IP club. Can TJC experience RADICAL changes within the short span of 2-3 years in order to bring the new IP juniors a completely challenging environment? To chip in, myself from the elite Scholarship Preparatory Programme, the fifty of us have a new challenges. We all got ambitious, radical projects to show to the admin. They just made radical changes to the subject combinations. The thing is, will the 27th and 28th Students' Council, the admin and most especially the student community will be ready to accept any radical changes that the 50 elites propose? We got stressbusters, expansion of the arts, speakers' corner etc. in mind..... is TJC ready for change? Is TJC ready for the new perestroika and glasnost? It's the Future. Now.

On my personal front, it's a year of reflection. The transition from secondary school to JC wasn't smooth, especially if you consider someone who left Chung Cheng with flying colours only to see himself back to square one in TJC. Did I do well enough? Was I active enough? The mediocre JCT and Promo grades is a huge wake-up call for me. How am I going to rectify them next year, especially with S papers and A levels?

The debate and robotics front didn't do well. I failed to get into the council. Sound as though 2003 was bad for me. But on the other hand, there was alot of positive light in me when I entered TJC. My Ohana I OG mates were the one who shaped what Zenon should be in TJC. They made sure that I wasn't left behind. And I wasn't left behind, mind you. I got to know wider circles and greater round of opinions from various backgrounds. I got to make friends with non-Chinese after a 4-year drought. I got active in the Online Forums as moderator.

However, as I walk into 2004, the year of the Monkey, I've to be even more careful and diligent. It's like the final battle, my own version of the battle of the Pelennor Fields. The almanac predicts a grim year ahead for tiger babies, my mum says the monkey year is always the year of pessimistic events. So the biggest challenge is how the haughty tiger subdues the cheeky monkey? My A levels.... is at stake. My path to university and career is really at stake. My O levels was like Helm's Deep. My A levels is now like Minas Tirith. I really have to do something desperately to savage all efforts back to bring back the distinctions. Bring back the pride of myself, the muster of Zenon. SAT (24 days left), and in future, NS..... it's no laughing matter. Also, on the other side, I really have to learn to be sensitive with other's feelings, and be careful with my words. It's really been difficult trying to remake myself. I'm glad to make friends like Jeremy, Min Dan, Jian Wei etc. Many of my TJ peers who are close to me are like the Kang Youwei and Liang Qichao in my life. I really have to make changes to my performance, my character, my personality. JC life is such a pivotal time of one's life.

Next year, TJC is hosting the MOE debates, and I cannot afford any internal conflict or disagreements with my coach and fellow exco members. It's not mine or my peers or the society's reputation at stake. It's the college's reputation at stake! Just as I said earlier, can TJC make radical changes smoothly? I guess this competition is important to contribute to radical changes if we want a community of intellectual and thinking 15-year old juniors who enjoy discussing and debating various issues. It'll affect the college spirit and culture significantly.

In short, 2004 is a tumultous year. It's sink or swim, it's do or die. It's the deciding year of my future. It's also the deciding year of TJC, Singapore and the world. It's the the great battle of our time, in which many things shall pass away, says Theoden.

As we bid 2003 goodbye and welcome 2004, I wish that in this new year, may all your wishes may come true, and that in whatever you do, may you always have happy returns and smooth tidings. And of course, another greeting from me for this new year.

HAPPY NEW YEAR!!!
|

looking forward

It's a few days left before school reopens... and it's now time to get your academic stuffs organised before you..... (you know what)....

Anyway, the rainy season seemed to have ended abruptly! It's too DARN HOT now! Personally I was more used to the rain and I have the feeling that global warming and the greenhouse effect is really taking shape.... is the earth in greater trouble? I think them NE monsoon ended too short and too early. Geography students, do you agree with me?

Anyway I went out to my mum to tampines central yesterday to shop on CLOTHES!!! And a pair of sports shoes for me which cost more than $100!!! Well all because my feet didn't feel confortable in those cheaper and more popular shoes which mean my mum can only buy 1 pair of shoes instead of 2 pairs for new year.... on the clothing side, I'm sort of settled except for pants (perhaps good preparation for CNY, friendship day, house function, grad nite etc...).... well as usual new year shopping is always a huge bomb on our family's coffers.....

By the way... please watch the Mission on channel 8 tomorrow at 8.30pm to see Min Dan and Rachel in action!!! Sorry I couldn't support them thanks to all the necessary shopping I had to do....

And I promised you all a small note about LOTR:ROTK

So mellon-nin, are you touched? Personally I feel that Peter Jackson has done a really great job, purposely altering the original content to make things more chilling and tense. Thumbs up for Mount Doom, Pelennor Fields, as well as the beacons... However we didn't get to see the Scouring of the Shire and the fall of Saruman's power. (According to the text, Wormtongue threw the palantir down from orthanc and Pippin picked it up) We also didn't get to see the Houses of Healing, showing Faramir and Eowyn consoling each other. Too bad we don't see it....

I'm waiting for the extended edition to come out soon, and perhaps I'll buy the VCD as a trilogy... maybe it might be cheaper or what...

I've to agree with many others that Samwise was the unsung hero. Without him, I think Frodo will be likely to succumb to Gollum's evil designs easily. Remember that despite Frodo chasing him away at Cirith Ungol, Samwise still followed him and fought Shelob, Shagrat, etc. bravely. His effort in making the futile mission a success is really commendable. His motivating and tenacious spirit (just as he carried Frodo along Mount Doom) is something no one can match with. Perhaps all of us should reflect if we ever came across a Samwise in our life. If the answer's yes, have we really treasured and appreciated his presence? I guess all of us would really wish to have a Samwise who'll always go through thick and thin no matter what happens, and only when we discover our Samwise, then we can only find true friendship. Really something interesting to reflect on.

|

a small reunion

Yesterday........ Christmas Day..... a rather weird day for a gathering for the Christian-dominated Chung Cheng percussion section. Well I managed to catch up with Yiwen and Xin Han in Suntec. We spent quite some time walking around, like Tower Records and some sports shops where Xin Han was pondering over which pair of soccer shoes to buy (any recommendations?). Also... he's looking for a new wallet. (his is about 3-4 yrs old)

*ah! speaking of wallets, some girls in my old cg 21/03 asked me to change my wallet.. to perhaps black and less bulky..... now back to the story

Well at least I managed to keep myself updated on my long-lost seniors...
Merrylin is in NUS Arts/Social Sciences (I thought she was in mass comm)
Jimmy in OCS (oh my gosh!! he didn't turn up, i wonder how he'll look like. anyway he does have the personality of being an army officer)
Yiwen and Janice are in NTU Mechanical Engineering
Xinhan enlisting in mid-Jan

As for Zhihai, Zhumei and Alecia who didn't turn up, I dunno what's their future plans... as they complete their A levels this year. Also didn't get to see Ren Long (VJC), Benjamin (TPJC) and Nicholas (AJC). Hope they got promoted with the grades they're satisfied with. Xiu Feng and Zhiming..... well their prelim results means that they won't get to a credible jc but they really did their best. Well I didn't get to see them yesterday... I heard that Xiu Feng plans to go poly. As for Zhiming, personally I felt that he had the potential to do well for his O levels, and perhaps even become a TJCian! heheh..... Our section always had 1 TJCian per batch for the past few years... hopefully Zhiming makes the mark...

Zhengyi, Linlin, Guo Hong..... also didn't see them... I'd love to hear what's really happening in chung cheng (for those who know given the rising discontent against... *censored*)

Well had quite a nice time. It would have been much better with the whole section around... but at least got to hear alot of interesting stuff, esp. of Xinhan's complains about the weird TJ science tutors that our batch don't get to meet.... as for Yiwen, she's the same as ever... she plans to organize another gathering again.... anyway, she told me that Mr Wong is organizing an "Alumni Gathering" this first sunday of Jan. Dunno whether to go or not..... (cos' Mr Wong was quite disappointed with me not being in TJ Band) I really hope that the school admin will have a better opinion of our band and let them have their own public concert next year. (last one was in 1999!!)We've been combining with the choir for so many times, we really deserve to be solo. (1998, 2000, 2002)

I've really been guilty of not being so contributing to the band as an Alumni member, unlike the other people. Well perhaps I'm too bogged down academically and too attached to this screen that I just really forget about my juniors... I even forgot about their concert this month! I think nobody really miss me.......

It's less than 7 days to being a JC2 student. Still got unfinished holiday assignments... history s, econs, and some maths questions. And haven't studied for chem and econs test! argh.... can't really go online too much for the next 7 days..... really daobi.... I cannot imagine how I'm going to cope with 4 A and 2S next year.... which means.... less contacts with my old friends... so sad..... time is short yet precious.... dunno how man......

Anyway, it is rather weird that no one has tagged in my board ever since my article about Steve Chia. Are you all scared of saying something or you all just can't be bothered? I hope it's the former, then you can PM me or email me or voice it out in the TJC Forums. Well he resigned and I really hope that he can recover on time for the 2007 elections with all family issues sorted out right.... but I stay by my stand that in NO way that this scandal causes the votes to go against him. Let meritocracy prevail.

And..... do cherish your life. The latest news about the gas leak in China and the Iran earthquake is really disturbing especially during the festive season. Take care...

And soon to come..... a small note about LOTR:ROTK.... and please please please leave a note in my tagboard... so that I know that you're reading this....
|

Scandals

Sorry for not updating so long, this is because for the past week I've been moderating the PAE-related forum in TJC online forums where I've to handle alot of questions regarding appeals/orientation etc. Also, I've been writing testimonials for about 3/4 of my friends in Friendster (given the fact that this website lags terribly despite myself having a broadband connection).

Recently, Singaporeans have been raising their eyebrows over.......(you-know-who)...
Well my mum just told me one sentence: "Clinton survived the huge scandal because of his wife's faith and support. Steve will not survive this small scandal because his wife betrayed him." Well by right it should be a personal and private matter, but thanks to Mrs Chia and the media, we've a scandal right here. So... what I've to say?

I believe that Steve will survive. He is the symbol of Singapore's "new opposition", apart from WP's new female secretary general. However, he'll need a great deal of time to rebuild his "shattered" credibility, which he has struggled so hard to build it during the 2001 elections. But whether he can survive depends on the attitude that we Singaporeans and of course, Mrs Chia. A new bombshell is now thrown at us. What is it? It's conservatism.

As Singapore gets liberalised gradually, issues such as homosexual rights, nudism, bartop dancing etc. are common debates. I salute Steve for his open-mindedness towards such issues. The thing is, I believe that we can tackle these rather 'dirty' issues (like nudism) with positive mind. I wonder why people treat this "nude" issue with sceptism. In the first place, did he do it with his maid? (Mind you, Clinton and Lewinsky really did it.) If we can accept with some 'patience' the liberalisation of bartop dancing and gays being in the civil service, why make a big fuss over nude as an ART, which I believe was Steve's actual motivation? Unfortunately, the maid has to suffer, and yes, it's Steve's blunder to leave it in the recycle bin and it's Mrs Chia's fault to blow up this issue. No laws were broken!

I think Singaporeans need to treat such sensitive issues with open minds, and weigh the effects in Singapore. They should try to look more on the brighter and positive sides of these issues. Open-mindedness comes with responsiblity. Mrs Chia is guilty for violating this clause. If she had spoken to Steve and the maid before blowing this up, I believe that the clash of conservatism and openess could be softened. I can only hope that things don't turn for the worse especially when she's about to give birth soon. The child will suffer the most from this apparently ridiculous conflict, and noone wants a broken family. I'm sure the PAP government, a strong advocate of united and peaceful families, will not want to handle so many frustrations from their voters over such issues.

Political apathy in Singapore will be a big issue again this time. Are we willing to give Steve a chance, since this is a private matter? Remember Education Minister Tharman Sharmugaratnam? People were saying about him getting into trouble over some financial-related stuff in a private company, and yet they did not bother about it and they just voted him? C'mon, look at the merits of politicians! Look at their performance at the political arena, NOT the private and scandalous arena! Let meritocracy prevail, NOT scandals!!

As we read through this scandal, I guess that, if you want Steve to survive this scandal, forget it in 4 year's time. If you choose to remember it, then it seems that the conservative, old-style confucian (or jokingly, confusion) will remain in Singapore in the long run, giving little leeway to openess and liberalism. The new generation (which includes myself) will have to realise what brings us forward, and the choices we make will justify the future.
|

ok....... responses to tags:

Su Hui: thanks for visiting! I see that you also have interesting reads in your revamped blog.
Saejan and Sikoden: Finally you all clarified.... I think you all should try to get to know each other better.....

soon to come..... my comment on LOTR.... the return of the king..... coming soon!

|

zeligdhilee breaking the MUSIC.
16:53

merry christmas

Firstly... I'll like to wish all my readers MERRY Christmas! Well take this time to cherish whatever bonds and friendships that you all have, and may you all have success in whatever endeavours that you all pursue. I have a small greeting here in which you can savour the year 2003 and embrace the year 2004. Enjoy this festive season!

|

zeligdhilee breaking the MUSIC.
16:48

Tuesday, December 16, 2003

"We got him"..... so what?

I've enough of the frontpage reports..... well if you ever want to know, personally I opposed the American invasion of Iraq, and I've even greater opposition for Singapore's support for the war. In my opinion, terrorism (or Al-Qaeda) and Saddam are different issues, and the thing is, we need to deal with the terrorists first before Saddam (all thanks to Bush), like what everyone knows about this acronym:

Beat
Up
Saddam
Hussein

Well he got him.... but the thing is, the world is really in a tangled mess.... he has undermined the UN once... and now the UN is rather in a mess. Now they're having second thoughts about dealing with Iraq (ever since the car banged into their headquarters) ... now the UN lacks now is decisiveness and crediblity, partly due to Bush's impatience....

The Iraqi insurgency is likely to intensify their attacks..... now I wonder when Iraq will have peace....

Yes, Saddam Hussein is an evil man and his actions such as torturing and gassing people is unforgivable. Personally, I also wanted him to be put to justice, but not as swift as I expected! Yes, we'll see him getting tried, but to me, Saddam Hussein is just one person. The current problem of terrorism, and the possiblity of Al-Qaeda using Iraq as a hotbed is a greater nightmare to be concerned with! For this I pity the Iraqi people (and I hope nothing happens to our Singapore troops whom MINDEF has decided to send as an US ally) and I can only hope that peace comes quickly.....

The insurgency will stay..... unlike Afghanistan, the US has even greater challenges right here in Iraq. Putting Saddam on trial and passing judgement on him isn't enough for Bush to capitalise for next year's re-election! If the insurgents are not crushed, if the WMDs are not found, if the UN continues to be timid........ the world will be even in greater hell compared to 9/11.

I can only hope that both the US and UN will reconcile (given Annan's unhappiness with Bush's actions) and that the UN will be more serious about reconstructing Iraq! One car bomb slammed into their headquarters shouldn't shake them so easily! Look at America! Two 110-storey towers and one Pentagon! Yet they were tenacious!

And I hope the WMDs will be found quickly, otherwise we'll have even more to fear.... you know how cunning Al-Qaeda and their network can be.... and also..... it'll be a big embarrassment for Bush.

Finally, the big issue here is the new Iraqi government. Will it be able to pass decisons fairly without the US poking in indirectly? Will there be racial and religious tolerance, something that is neglected in the Middle East? I think the future Iraqi government is the most important of all in order to restore the peace and stability that we used to have. The new government needs strength and control over the whole country (unlike Afghanistan).. and the economy needs to be rebuilt as quick as possible....... otherwise..... we can all be prepared for Saddam Hussein number two.

|

zeligdhilee breaking the MUSIC.
19:16

Sunday, December 14, 2003

responses

there has been a heated uproar over my latest article about the "reliability of online tests", which has even lead to a counter-criticism in another party's blog. I was shocked that my readers would response so angrily to what I've said, but can the people concerned please relax, just as jordan said quizzes are only quizzes. I wrote this article for the purpose of exploring the symbolicism of online tests.... the thing is, it's up to you to decide its reliability but don't go to the extent of accusing the author of ignorance, etc.. it's your own opinion and we have the right to alter or disregard our own results... that's why at times we feel online tests may not be so reliable! what cometo has said stands!

ok.... I'm planning to write something this week, but less, cos' I'll be busy with econs project, unfinished holiday homework (argh! less than 3 weeks left!), writing testimonials and so on.... the thing is my life has been rather boring being seated in front of this screen so I need to find ways to create an article out here..... but give me some time, ok? I'm just as slacky and freaky like bart simpson above..... need to relax...

|

zeligdhilee breaking the MUSIC.
16:09

Saturday, December 13, 2003

postscript to vasu's latest tag... regarding saejan.... a hint here: he's a non-debate senior. and one more thing, fyi, in singapore the problem regarding IPs applies here.

|

zeligdhilee breaking the MUSIC.
22:31

busy.....

ok nothing much to say except that I'm busy writing testimonials... abit frustrating cos' you really have to use your words carefully given my rather insensitive nature of myself...

Firstly, I'd like to thank vasudha for her clarification. well I suspected that it was an imposter but given the fact that several households share one IP address so i can't really find out who is the real culprit. Well you're always welcome to give any comments on my tagboard.....

And to Saejan, if you have too many things to say, you can PM me in the main TJC forum. Well are you trying to imply that we should look at the two parties in detail? (which means the test-creator and the test-taker?)...

IMPORTANT NOTE: TJC forumers who have long comments regarding to my blog, pls PM me, don't post your comments openly in the forums since what I said in my blog has nothing to do with the forums. Thanks..

|

zeligdhilee breaking the MUSIC.
22:26

Friday, December 12, 2003

new look

ok..... I've just changed my blogskin.... looks nice? Well for your info one of my favourite TV shows is none other than the simpsons...... that's why i chose this skin..... i couldn't find any good harry potter skins...... I've been watching simpsons since primary school.... and you can always feel the charm of the programme given that Matt Groening knows how to create new plots all the time...

however, the problem is this skin I want to have certain sections of the text blue like the date heading but I can't do it....also not all my titles for my posts show (I've to copy the title programming from my backup) so can a HTML expert help me out over this? thanks

P/S: My responses to the tags:

cometo1999: ok. Well said as well. It depends on our own impressions of ourself. But don't worry, I won't go into other ppl's blogs to comment on their quiz results, cos' it lacks a true reflection of a person's personality.

jordan: since you said I should feel honoured than I'd suggest you invite more ppl from tjc or wherever to patronize my blog, then I'll be even happier. I'd appreciate your effort. But: pls don't write rubbish tags, ok? the word 'freaky' is ok but pls, no other -ve stuff. AND.... pls identify yourself...... how am I going to recall who you are if you don't reveal your true identity?

|

zeligdhilee breaking the MUSIC.
22:52

The reliability of online tests

A common sight in people's blogs are pictures of results of quizzes, in particular from quizilla.com. Well I looked through all those tests and i felt, are these test-creators and test-takers really know how to make one, and do these test-takers really believe in the results of the test concerned? The thing, is, sometimes the results can be very different from what you expect, and sometimes you may not like it! So, the question is, how reliable are online tests?

Quizilla allows everyone, regardless to whether they're professionals, to create such tests. So, what is the real gauge of such tests? What kind of answers determine the result? Such factors can affect a test's reliability very significantly!

Let's take a look at a website i frequent: Emode. I'd say that they're a very established test-taking company. The fact that they claim that most of their tests are created by professional psychologists and psychatrists would naturally attract people to take their tests, and make those people (including me) perceive that the results and advice given is highly reliable! However, the flipside is, you've to fork out some money to see your detailed reports, so it may be a deterrent for the high professionalism of Emode and its reliability that other sites like quizilla lacks.

Well I'd like to ask our fellow bloggers, what is the purpose of putting up your test results here? Is it to show off, or to compare with others? Is it a true reflection of your own personality that it is worth showing the results? Or is it for the sake of decoration?

Well I myself isn't very sure about online tests, but personally, Emode has at times got close to what I think I am. Well, for you all, I don't know, but it seems that we tend to get a pinch of influence of our personalities when we attempt such online tests...

P/S: (My responses to the tags)

ashke: yes, that was the one I was talking about, i think the one that you went to. so sad i couldn't join you, otherwise it would be very fun.

anonymous: i think you should identify yourself first before asking saejan who he is. I guess he'd like to know who is the one asking for his identity.

Saejan Gracer: Finally, you've came! Well thanks for coming, and do leave any comments if you want to, given that you like to analyse things alot.

|

zeligdhilee breaking the MUSIC.
12:27

Thursday, December 11, 2003

yesterday I was at min dan's place doing econs project.... well we went through the skeleton and realise that there's a high possiblity of exceeding easily.... anyway i heard that the all the seniors boycotted the econs holiday stuff...dunno whether it's true but our group just decided to go on with it anyway...

well min dan asked me to do something interesting... guess what.... if you're observant enough you'll see that I added something to my sidebar and that's the answer....

|

zeligdhilee breaking the MUSIC.
20:39

Tuesday, December 09, 2003

what's next

Mr Hasim gave me an overdue call of 10 days saying that he can't let me into the research internship stuff, on the basis of "tutor's discussions"..... well i don't know and i realise the one Mr Bala asked me (and i declined) was exactly the same as Mr Hasim's one (argh)..... well waited soooo long for his reply that half of my holiday is wasted (joey if you see this, I'm free anytime)

if you take a look at ashke's blog you'll find out what's she's doing cos' she's one of the lucky three.....

well i dunno what to do.... tomorrow going to min dan's house to do econs..... quite bored...also consider quite late to take up a temp job..... still got my holiday homework as well as another major project to do (joey and co. will know this)...

i now wonder if i ever regret giving up the TIP... well theatre wasn't my cheese but to be frank, if I was in the theatre TIP, I'll either make a fool of myself (due to poor literature appreciation) or I'll end up suggesting the ppl there to make up a play that'll make a mockery of someone, symbolising our marginallized youth in a pressurized education system..... (mr tong said I could've gave alot of ideas to the playwrights there) wanna know who? (ex-cchs ppl should think of someone they don't like).... well's that for fun... heheh......

|

zeligdhilee breaking the MUSIC.
23:59

a small advertisement

well if you all are interested in reading some good harry potter fanfiction, I'd recommend some written by AgiVega, a Hungarian college student. That's why you see the yahoo group link on my blog. (that's her yahoo group) Her fics mainly focus on love relationships, and she can really stand up to Rowling. Her fics are posted on fanficton.net in which you can access by clicking here.

It's optional to join her group, and she's also a good artist. Take a look at her fanart and you'll enjoy it.

If you all have any good HP/LOTR fanfics to recommend out here, I'd appreciate if you all can leave it in the tagboard. Well it's a good time to see how avid fans think about their favourite books in the form of stories...... but it's also a rarity cos' most of them are of poor standards......

|

zeligdhilee breaking the MUSIC.
20:45

ok...... the last post by Jordon was actually written by sikoden, as he has said, so can Jordon pls reveal your class pls? (btw: you're not alone, sikoden's from east view) I'd greatly appreciate that but i wonder what's your criteria for calling me a freak......

and I'm still waiting for vasudha's reply.....

and one more thing: i don't like anonymous visitors. even if you wish to not to say anything, just identify yourself with a hi or what.... it's okay and i won't do anything to you. it's good to see who frequents your blog, right?

|

zeligdhilee breaking the MUSIC.
15:41

Monday, December 08, 2003

some developments in my tagboard has require me to say something....

Firstly, I do not recall any primary school mate with the name jordan. Please reveal your true identity. Also, I feel that Ms Ong (the chinese teacher i assume) is a fair teacher and she wouldn't favour someone in particular. and please don't call me a freak.

To adrian_lkf, pls identify yourself clearly where you are from.... i know an adrian from tjc but you don't seem familiar.....

and to anonymous, it's pointless to say that you decline to comment. i'd appreciate that you identify yourself with some nick, if not pls say something.

and yes, sikoden: we shall see but it's possible that it's a prank......

|

zeligdhilee breaking the MUSIC.
22:39

a small comment about the star awards...

Have you all noticed some sort of domination in the star awards........ that.... (whatever)

personally I'm not surprised about who won the various awards and i think whoever won it quite deserve it, but at times i'm sick about certain monopolies in the awards.... a good example is Sharon Au's Best Variety Show award, as well as the Best Comedian role being given to the Liang2 Jia1 Ban1....

well to be frank they did a great job in their respective fields but i think that at times someone else should be given a chance..... just like Chen Liping said that the other Unforgettable Characters nominees deserved the prize just as she did......

well nevertheless it was more than expected esp for the popular artistes, though i was shocked that Chen Liping wasn't one of the 10 winners....

and personally i hope that Fann and Chris do win big next year, just as Zoe and Li got on stage several times last night..... but it's quite hard, given that the shows they acted in would give only slim chances of winning....

let's watch the last 5 episodes of Always on my Mind! (and of course my mom chides me for not watching Moon Fairy and for not being willing to learn about chinese culture cos' i tend to go online at that hour).... heheh.....

|

zeligdhilee breaking the MUSIC.
13:24

First week anniversary

Today is the first week anniversary of Draco Dormiens...... well today i don't have much to say (maybe tonight i may write a mini-essay tonight) except that i'd like to thank the following ppl for leaving their notes in my tagboard:

ashke, sikoden, vasudha, cometo_1999, jonathan and alphazero (left a critical review on one of my articles in the TJC main forum)

ok.... regarding my tagboard..... i'll not say anything as usual but I'm sure all of us would like to hear vasudha's response to her apparently 'blunt' statements of the following.....

vasudha:i love u zenon!
vasudha:oops i mean u r cool

I'm flabbergassted by your remarks, really.....

|

zeligdhilee breaking the MUSIC.
13:17

Sunday, December 07, 2003

To slack or not to slack, that is the question of holidays (or to work or not to work) (Part II)

okay..... let's continue on....... i was touching on about the 'vicious cycle'... allow me to firstly to mention that the following extract is written by Mr Francis Tay, my bio and ex-civics tutor of 21/03.......

====================

You wake up early and you are in school before the sun rises.
Lecturers and tutors expect you to give them your 100% for every lesson.
When you get home at 7pm, you have a quick dinner, shower and
Soon, you are at your desk again, looking at your lecture notes and tutorials.
Your eyelids begin to feel like they are made of lead and you fight just to complete reading one paragraph.
Before you know it, you have either fallen asleep or it is time to sleep anyway, being 12 midnight.
You envy the lives of the two goldfishes in your fish tank and wonder if there will be an end to the torture.

Feeling the 'strain' of college life? College life is packed full of activities and some find it tough to adjust.
There are no tricks or short cuts but it is important to make full use of your time in school.
When there are free periods, look through your lecture notes, do your tutorials that are due tomorrow - complete as much as you can in school so that there is less to do at home.

It is very important that you derive as much from tutorials as possible. Think of it as a game of PacMan. What is your lecturere/tutor trying to tell you? They will make many important points as they speak. Think of these points as the prized 'Fruits' in a game of PacMan. How many 'fruits can i swallow' each tutorial. You have to pay attention in class or you will suffer.

The Vicious Cycle
The less you learn in class/lecture, the more you need to read up on your own after school and the more time you need to spend asking your friends for answers. This means working late into the night and less sleep. Next day you are tired in class as a result and you can't pay attention. You start to miss the important points and soon there is a 'gap' in your knowledge which slows you down even more when other new but related topics are taught.

Stay clear of the vicious cycle. Have sufficient sleep at night. But this is only possible if you make good use of your school time.

=====================

And so, the thing is, is our life worth working or slacking? i only realised the full extent of slacking when i entered 33/03......

the thing is, is it worth doing something "morally correct" such as internships, projects, holiday homework (sigh) when it means there is no real meaning of holidays? is it worth being a 'robot' being asked around by our tutors to do something "morally correct"? i feel as though my holidays are just like the working adult's week.... without any meaning....

holidays is meant for taking a rest or break from our hectic lifestyle or 'vicious cycle'..... unfortunately, this is not to be..... is it really justified to ever have holidays then? or is it better to slack the whole year round?

I just cleaned up my study area this morning with my mum's complaints and help. and she says that it is now that i start studying (jonathan thought i was mugging all the while, my answer is no)... well.... is this really a break we can enjoy.. or is it still work?

to me, the most important thing here is self-discipline..... your self-discipline will determine whether the quotation to slack or not to slack or to work or not to work completes the sentence, that is the question of holidays. frankly speaking, i feel that the reason why myself (and perhaps you, the reader) have not been doing well academically, as well as not making good use of my holidays to enjoy myself is the lack of self-discipline. Because we lack such 'self-discipline', we are unable to choose which quote who complete the sentence! we either slack too much or work too much, hence questioning what is the real meaning and symbol of holidays....

One's passion, strengths and weaknesses do apply as well. I feel that, a 'moderation' of stuff can be present, but it's really up to our own gauge, the strengths and weaknesses. if we want to do something, we do it, if not forget it especially if you don't like it..... that's why we've impulsiveness as well...... and including the vicious cycle.

hence, i feel that the question of holidays is the issue of making good use of the freedom. well it seems that we want to search for the right path, the right motivation and the right way...and we think we've found it. However in reality, we never seem to reach the right path, or to get into a path full of our own delusions and defilements......... we have to continue to find..... OUR OWN PATH........

a phrase i ever heard will make us think about it........
"Your altitude depends on your attitude"

|

zeligdhilee breaking the MUSIC.
12:33

So what are we here for?

As I'm the owner of this blog and flooble chatbox, I be the judge.....

So who started this pointless debate?

vasudha created the motion (she said, "either one of you murder me, you and jonathan actually sound similar [ouch!] in a good way.", so jonathan started the debate by rebutting her and I encouraged you all to continue..... so it's the fault of the whole debate exco that we have this 'pointless' debate about zenon.... and if you all go to jonathan's blog, there's also another lame motion describing him as...... (find out yourself).......

and I like cometo's reply. The thing is, I've written these few mini-essays right here, expecting you all to give your comments about it or rebut me..... and what's the result? it's better to argue about my blog content rather than about me! I couldn't agree more with her. otherwise it's pointless and a waste of time to write essays about impulsiveness, competitiveness, etc.... now i wonder whether i should continue writing....

and that's the kind of 'liveliness' that sikoden described that i want....... see???

|

zeligdhilee breaking the MUSIC.
12:00

Saturday, December 06, 2003

take a look at the tagboard extract and our dear debate pres & vice-pres are close to quarelling over me......

vasudha: in case, either one of you murder me, you and jonathan actually sound similar [ouch!] in a good way. both of you tend to think alot. interesting read btw, i like maksim too!

zenonlee: thanks for visiting.... but i don't have any reason to murder you except that you get too bitchy, frustrated like a balloon that is going to burst anytime... relax, ok? I haven't read jonathan's blog, but i can't really comment on how interesting it is. I'll write more next time.....

jonathan: dear vasu every1 thinks a lot, and i should say putting him and i in comparision is seriously screwed. Perhaps u would like to alter ur comparison criteria?

zenonlee: your first sentence is quite a good rebutal initially, but i think you seem really angry or sweeping in describing vasudha's judgement... well why not you ask vasudha to state her comparision criteria, only then we can alter. thanks. well all debators have to think alot, unfortunately we've so little time.

anyway..... to ashke: thanks for visiting... you might be reading the forum threads silently, but i know it's going to be quite difficult to change whatever that needs to be changed and it takes time.... (right, su hui?)

that's all to zenon's responses to your tags. i welcome vasu and jonathan to continue their debate in my tagboard, but please do not write any personal attacks towards anyone......

|

zeligdhilee breaking the MUSIC.
11:54

Friday, December 05, 2003

To slack or not to slack, that is the question of holidays. (or to work or not to work)

ok.... haven't updated for a day.... now I'm trying to get my notes, stuff, etc organised.... luckily you ppl don't visit my house or you all will faint when you all see my table.... my mother complains about it and i dunno how to sort it out at these moment.... now getting 4 huge files (for the 4 subjects) and hopefully.....

frankly speaking, i haven't get everything really done like hols hw, etc.... but i plan to use dec to do something about my academic since i sort of slacked the past couple of weeks over forums, online games, etc......

we shall see how it goes... especially when my mom wants me to do intensive organisation, revision esp for GP (my peers would know how disastrous it was for me).....

personally i feel holidays take away the 'discipline' that we students tend to possess and that is revision, doing assignments etc.. however we yearn for hols sooooo much for the sake from escaping from the vicious period of studying... argh....

you know, my ex-civics tutor ever coined the term "vicious cycle" to describe our jc life.... and we're really trapped in it..... only to be liberated when we leave the course of education...

to be continued.....

|

zeligdhilee breaking the MUSIC.
21:01

Wednesday, December 03, 2003

Competitiveness

Today I didn't go out today so it's pretty boring out here writing these stuff here. anyway malaysia just defeated singapore 2-0.... argh... what happened to our cubs? are our cubs just unlucky that their chances couldn't materialise... well they were tenacious but it's a real pity all of these didn't convert into goals.....

Malaysia and Singapore are considered arch-rivals. not only on the diplomatic but also on the sporting side.... in particularly this afternoon's humilating match... 4-0 last yr and 2-0 this year... what's next.... the thing is, we neighbours seem to compete with each other so much that we sort of being closely related together by such "covalent" bonds....

Why do I use the word "covalent"? Covalent bonds are considered strong intermolecular forces, but one heated disagreement (in the form of heat energy) will easily break the "weak van der waals forces of attraction".... and the molecules break apart..... just as s'pore and m'sia had their differences but we seem to be interdependant economically and socially....

So why the topic "competitiveness"?

take a look at this link below:
click here


i've been having a discussion with jonathan for the past 1-2 days... and he seem to be highlighting a huge problem in my personality --- insensitivity, arrogance, etc...

well to me i now wonder whether the word "competitiveness" is the root of this... another motion i can think about is... "This house believes that competitiveness brings only negative effects".... mr chin was the first person to coin this term to me.... and he brought in the word that seem so prevalent in myself for more than a year....

back in chung cheng, my bandmate would ask me,"zee-non, how much you got?" at that time we were merely sec 2s... he was superior on the science side while i was superior on the humanitites side.... well we weren't on good terms but it fuelled something in my life ---- competitiveness

when i was in chung cheng 3cr/4cr 01/02..... i ever told friends that A and B poses a threat to me academically...at times, A and B may not be performing well when i make this remark, but they got flattered that one of them would beat me or the latter would be on par or narrowly defeated.....

and of course someone called C will say, "zenon you so lousy ah..... sure lose to me one... wish you the worst in your exams... well by human nature i would defintely get offended and pissed and..... you know the rest. (btw these are one of half of my sec sch class who are now tjcians and A,B,C,D, etc... are also tjcians)

so when i ace.... well that's the results of such competition where you'll end up having ppl glamourising you and wadeva.... and i myself take the pride so seriously that jonathan himself told me that his purpose of "shooting me down" was to contain my "arrogance"... and he said it is now that i change.

that's why i created the motion above..... i realised the negative effects of competitiveness...... why?
(1) it creates arrogance in yourself that you've a tendency to show off, hence others get pissed off
(2) you get complacent that someone is actually catching up or defeating you
(3) it makes you even more stressed up than the normal academically strong person
(4) you neglect other aspects of your life......
(5) or in the economic sense, your short-run "supernormal" profits get eroded into "normal" profits in the long run, hence nobody really wins.
(6) in HP, hermione always seems frustrated by her performance that she keeps on pushing harry and ron, and even saw mcgonagall as her boggart

(I know many of you will be drawing your bullets to 'shoot' me......)

i now think very seriously whether the issue of "competitveness" causes me to have so much undue stress and unnecessary debates. or should i avoid such competition and let excellence takes its own course....? my cg-mates are rather unhappy by such "competitiveness" compared to my sec4 class who would take it more into their hearts... from a ordinary hufflepuffi (many HP fansites sort me there) i ended up being a slytherin which i dunno wanna be in....

do u think such "competitiveness" is unnecessary? i guess most of u here will say yes... for me i initially though not cos' i thought such competition would spur you to perform better (in any aspect) but after the conversation with jonathan, things appear to be different. (btw we didn't talk about competitiveness, in case u all forgot) if i try to change.. defintely's it'll be tough.... given the fact that many of my old mates (who are in other cgs) will continue to mock me that i'll become inferior to them, i dunno how! I sort of created an artificial "credibility" that i'm a high-flyer, but all of these i feel in my heart is all sham.

despite the common saying "survival of the fittest", the think is, did we consider other factors like the surroundings and how ppl would react? i think i didn't and i sort of cause some unhappiness to the "outsiders" (those who are offended by such competitiveness).... i think my times in 33 seem to be telling me how to relax and to be more understanding and sensitive, something that many competition lack for we tend to aim for the best blatantly with no mercy for others.

jonathan, your conversation sparked today's article.... because i was trying to find a root to my own problems and competitiveness may not be the sole reason....

i'm not saying that i'm going to be lax next yr, but it seems that there could be a new way to excellance..... perhaps humility? or being in a low-profile? you think about it and share your views on the right.

|

zeligdhilee breaking the MUSIC.
18:56

I've decided that I'll leave the flobble chatterbox.... to YOU!! I won't say anything there. You leave your comments in the chattlebox and I'll answer them in the form of a post..... so here it goes... I'll try to do this daily.... in general thanks for visiting and thank you all for all your insightful comments.... :-)

to sikoden: i'm trying to get a better template, that's why i asked where i can find good templates, but thanks for visiting anyway....

to jonathan: at least you're not laughing, thank goodness but thanks for your comment you gave in the main forum.... (perhaps we should give my motion to the juniors! heheh)

to cometo: that's why we've blogs! esp. during the hols when we don't see each other! and interesting suggestion indeed.... do check out the debating blog above... thanks for visiting...

|

zeligdhilee breaking the MUSIC.
12:44

Tuesday, December 02, 2003

Impulsiveness

well today my mum and i went to tampines central today...... the original plan of just going to ntuc and settle food expanded unfortunately to buying clothes! you know, it's the impulse factor that comes in for both of us today...clothes.... heheh (some of you from my class will start thinking of someone)

my mum got some clothes which is of a humble price, and when we passed by the open sale by isetan at tampines mall, oh my! the clothes (for me) were cheaper! I could've saved much more money for prom if I'd known about this sale!! 2 ties = $9.90 (compared to a one from robinson which is about ....... ) and pants about less than $30..... well it's meant for new year and the problem is, i've a surplus of short-sleeved shirts but a shortage of long-sleeved which made my prom-planning (this year) rather a frustrating one..... (so must look better for grad next yr)

well impulse, impulse, impulse.... i wonder whether if demand and supply is driven by impulse or needs? before you ppl start throwing eggs at me i would say that at times economic theories are rather useless at times, just as a woman may be enticed by its looks to buy dresses!

well that's the story of today..... is impulsiveness harmful or useful? i ask you.... an example to consider: Harry Potter acted on impulse that he feared Sirius Black could be captured by the death eaters. despite opposition from some of his DA members, he still insisted on getting to the MOM.... Sirius, out of concern and worry, sacrificed himself as a result........

and at time impulsiveness in general burn our pockets alot..... just as i was watching last sun's chinese debate, where the best speaker mentioned that because of ads, americans ended up having a store room's worth of useless stuff...... do we buy things out of impulse, due to ads, looks, etc?

sometimes i wonder why we consume so many things that we may not need it so much.....

perhaps we should create a motion saying "This house believes that impulsiveness is the root of consumerism".... (qiong hui, please don't laugh!!)

(P/S: thanks ashke for some tips on getting my blog done, and i'll promise you all that i'll get the tagboard done soon!! also, i'm searching for nicer templates so do contact me if you know of some good sites! thanks!)

|

zeligdhilee breaking the MUSIC.
19:37

Monday, December 01, 2003

in a tight spot

trying to get used to blogspot....... unfortunately not as user-friendly as i expected... argh.... wonder how to get it right.....

|

zeligdhilee breaking the MUSIC.
20:00

first post ever..... sometimes i ever wonder what's the real purpose of having a blog.. but given the hols out here i might as well do something out here......

|

zeligdhilee breaking the MUSIC.
19:19